Friday, October 9, 2015

The heart of the house

Today I did my banking, paid my rent and went grocery shopping with my kids.  When we got home, I lit a candle in my kitchen, I asked the kids to play upstairs and I prepared our meal.  I chopped carrots and cucumbers and put them in containers for future snacks.  I cut cheese into cubes for easy eating.  I made broccoli soup, pasta and pea meal bacon (I prepared it like a roast in the oven).  My kids came downstairs, they sat at the table and chatted while I poured their soup.  I leaned down and pulled out the roasting pan and felt this warmth spread over me.  It felt like Christmas, it felt like family, it felt like home.  I felt amazing and whole. I began to cry, I was so overwhelmed by this feeling. For years stress and conflict surrounded the kitchen, surrounded food preparation and cleaning.  I forgot how satisfying cooking a meal for your family can be, how food can be translated into love.  My children understood, they saw my tears and my smile and My daughter said: "Happy Thanksgiving mommy, thank you for making us this meal."  We all knew it wasn't our thanksgiving, but she felt it too.  We cleaned up together and ate forgotten gelato for dessert.   Another piece of me healed today,  we healed together today as a family.  We are going to be alright.  We are going to be just fine.